Casual Sex

My friend Alan is hurting rather badly. He is young, only 19ish, and has only had one true romance, while he has dallied with one other woman. His experience is rather slim, having only made love the one, and he has a healthy appetite for such things. The woman of his affections is firmly out of his grasp and so he is looking in all the wrong places for some relief. I feel for him deeply, it is well known that I have a weakness for the flesh, but I could not believe that he asked me for sex. Not after all my comments about believing that sex should be saved for love and what not. I did flirt with him a bit, he is a handsome young man and I am not about to say otherwise, but I never once offered any sort of comfort save for a hug.

It is odd to me that such a thing would be asked of me. I guess I do not see myself as being the sort of girl a guy would want to just sleep with for a night. I am not all that attractive really, yeah big tits and all, but I am heavy. I know I am not overly so in many men's eyes, but I am over weight, and I am not classically lovely. It was very flattering to be asked, especially by someone that I have coveted in the past, but I cannot break my morals so utterly. I am not sure he and I would be able to be friends afterwards and that is what really bothers me.

Aside from the fact that I think I am saving myself for Jeremy. It is stupid and silly, but I am willing to wait. I am not going to be dating anyone for alest another five months anyway so what do I lose by waiting around and flirting with the boy I believe myself in love with? It is rather silly still. I have turned down sex in part because of him now. I wonder if I should talk to him about it or not? ::sigh::