Jeremy-Justin

Jeremy is gay, or so he says. I don't know. I'm not sure what I believe. I do know that my dear friend loves me, and that he is jealous. He doesn't have to want to be sexual with me to want to be the most important man in my life.

Jeremy doesn't like Justin cause of WoW? That is bullshit. He is baseing his opinion off of Justin's choice in character race and class. It is bullshit. He has played both sides and is now trying to be all pro-Horde as if he had never played the Allince. Jeremy needs to take his head out of his ass. The lest he could do is be honest with himself. But he is just not very good at that.

How can he be gay if he is attracted to me? Was he lying? This is just stupid confusing.

See that? Right there! He flirted with me and admited that he finds me attrative, I mean wtf is going on!? Because here we have it, the epic disscussion in which he admits to me that he is a homosexual . . . . .

That is the begining of it, once I get on the phone with Justin and am able to get some information out of him it resuemes . . . .

So here we see him insulting my boyfriend for no reason what so ever, and then denying that he is jealous, yeah right. Things continue to get heated and he finaily gets tired of my not rising to his bait. And then loses his nerve. Let us return . . . .

There you have it, right fucking there! Does he not contridick himself? Stupid fucking boy. He is still in love with me, and that is fine, if he would fucking admit it. It is just so hurtful of him to play with me like this. But I don't think he understands, not really. It is not that I doubt him being attracted to men, but that he feels nothing romantic or sexual for me. The things that we have shared, and the things that we have told each other, the way he acts towards me, it all points to his feeling possive of me. And to a certain point that is alright, he is like a deffencive brother. and I love Jeremy, so I can take it. It is the fucking bullshit games that drive me insane. I want him to be happy, weather it is with a man or a woman, I just want him in my life and happy. But I am not sure how long this can go on. I am not going to tolerate senceless hate and rudness towards Justin. I would have delt with it when dating Pete or Andrew, but not my sweet Justin.

Fuck Jeremy. No matter what he has been to me, no matter how much he cares for me, if he cannot be happy for me then I do not need him. Justin is the best thing that has ever happened to me save for meeting Erin. And I am not giving either of them up. Erin tolerates Jeremy, but Jeremy is always fucking stiring shit, and I'm really on my last nerve.

I'm trying to calm down and let it go. we had a good friendly chat after that, he is still being an ass about WoW, but calmed down, was civilish. God it just pisses me off. I give and I give, and all he sees is that I'm happy and he isn't. I can tell that he has felt crummy, it happened when he got out of spring term, all he is doing is sitting in his room play WoW. He has one online class, and I doubt he gets out of the house even once a week now. He had quit WoW for a few months and was feeling better, now he is back on it and back in the rut. ::shakes head:: I just want to strangle him, I love him so much. Stupid fucking boy.

If he isn't careful he is going to push me away, far away, forever.